Saturday, December 13, 2003
So now my mother is pissed and my step-mother is acting strange. I don't know what to do. I know that I should be focused on taking care of my own problems, but part of that involves reevaluating the relationships in my life and trying to make them real. Maybe I just need to lead by example. It hurts when my mother is unwilling to consider her own fallibility. I had a long chat with my grandmother yesterday afternoon. We talked about all this a bit. She told me that perhaps my difficult family situation is just the trial set out for me to overcome. I mentioned Buddha and said that life is suffering. Period. She gives me hope that love can conquer all. I think this has been very good for me. I am bringing suppressed emotions to the surface and having to deal with them in order to remain calm. I am not responsible for the opinions others have of me. I am only responsible for being as true to myself as I can be. I guess that is what you call tough love.